Wisdom crums on a sunday morning

"The desire of freedom implies that we are prisoners"
"Crying or Rage does not change the present circumstances. Fearing or hoping does not determine what's yet to come"

This post was triggered by a Paradox, and proved once more that the ends connect everytime. Yesterday I laughed like I havent laughed in years, and today an old feeling, the exact opposite appeared on the surface of my emotional wide and deep ocean. The emotion that started everything.

5 years ago I was on a trip that I thought would change my life forever, and it did, just not the way I was wishing for. Life is a coin flip and sometimes it feels that the coin is bogus.
What I ignored 5 years ago was that the real lessons started when the dream of a nicer, quieter, prettier life across the Atlantic was over that december 27 2006 as the plane lifted its nose and left El Prat Airport. Right there I learned that tears burn the skin.

I can't really know if I will return to Barcelona and if I do, its clear that I won't return
to the same place. Places, people, time, colours, textures... All of those are mere
perceptions of the reality in one given moment so, I will return nowhere. And that is exactly
where I am now.

Today I bury a dead heart. It looks calcified. I'm still unsatisfied but at least I've stopped believing things will change on my benefit. I've stopped creating futuristic scenarios (One of my obsessions, and by far the most harming one) Im just learning to be just fine no matter
wich side of the coin I get. Past and future almost co-exist in a ridiculous amount of time
called present where the coin is on the air. All outcomes are uncertain, all scenarios are
possible. I don't have the enough knowledge to make forecasts. Nobody has.

I'm still unsatisfied, and working on eliminating all desire.